Ron Paul
« Previous EntriesPower Rankings are Dead, Long Live Power Rankings
Tuesday, November 4th, 2008It’s been a long time since we’ve done these, but since I won’t get another chance to do this for the 2008 cycle, it’s time to play Power Rankings. Let’s go! 1. Sen. Barack Hussein Obama II, D-Ill. (Last Rank: 1) What a long, strange trip it’s been. Five years ago, unless you were a [...]
Laramie is a Tough-Guy Town
Saturday, March 8th, 2008I understand we have numbers… Wyoming Democratic Caucus ✔Barack Obama 61% Hillary Clinton 38% Uncommitted 1% One teeny-tiny little state in the middle of the Mountain West, that can’t mean much, can it? Well maybe. At any rate, who’s up, who’s down, who’s out?
Praying for the End of Time
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008We’ve got power rankings, yes we do, we’ve got power rankings, how ’bout you? 1. Sen. Barack Obama, D-Ill. (Last Rank: 1) Glass-half-full spin: Obama’s taken Clinton’s best shot on the best terrain she’ll have for the entire primary season, and only lost about 10 delegates. And don’t forget, he closed a huge deficit in [...]
Don’t Call It a Comeback
Wednesday, March 5th, 2008A quick note — John McCain won everywhere. Those numbers aren’t interesting. These are: Vermont ☑Obama 60% Clinton 38% Other 2% Rhode Island ☑Clinton 58% Obama 40% Other 1% Ohio ☑Clinton 55% Obama 43% Other 2% Texas Primary ☑Clinton 51% Obama 47% Other 2% Caucuses* Obama 56% Clinton 44% *22% in So who’s up, who’s [...]
Tomorrow the Green Grass
Thursday, February 21st, 2008Time for the last power rankings before March 4. Giddy up! 1. Sen. Barack Obama, D-Ill. (Last Rank: 1) Ten wins in ten states, a 160-ish delegate lead among pledged delegates, all the momentum in the world, and the type of media fellating usually reserved for John McCain. That’s why Barack Obama is where he [...]
Super Power Rankings!
Thursday, February 14th, 2008Okay, they’re a bit late, I’ll admit it, but hey, it’s morning somewhere. As you’ll be able to see immediately, the format for the Power Rankings is changing this week; with the GOP race over and the Democratic race at least at the end of the beginning, it’s not really that interesting to break the [...]
Out There in the Shadow of a Modern Machine
Wednesday, February 13th, 2008Numbers, numbers, who’s got the numbers? Virginia Democrats ☑Obama 64% Clinton 35% Other 1% Republicans ☑McCain 50% Huckabee 41% Paul 5% Other 5% Maryland Democrats ☑Obama 60% Clinton 36% Other 4% Republicans ☑McCain 55% Huckabee 30% Paul 6% Other 9% District of Columbia Democrats ☑Obama 75% Clinton 24% Other 1% Republicans ☑McCain 68% Huckabee 17% [...]
Huckmentum!
Saturday, February 9th, 2008As we always do, we go first to the numbers: Democrats U.S. Virgin Islands* ☑Obama ~90% Clinton ~10% Nebraska ☑Obama 68% Clinton 32% Washington State ☑Obama 68% Clinton 31% Louisiana ☑Obama 57% Clinton 36% *Based on Associated Press report, no firm numbers available Republicans Kansas ☑Huckabee 60% McCain 24% Paul 11% Washington State☩ McCain 26% [...]
Ron Paul: Still a Misogynistic Douchebag
Saturday, February 9th, 2008We haven’t talked about Ron Paul that much lately, mainly because we don’t like to bring down the wrath of the eight Paulbots and their 1337 haxor skillz. But just in case Paul decides to run as a Libertarian, it’s a good idea to remember that he’s anti-choice as the day is long: Congressman Ron [...]
A Tie Goes to the Runner
Wednesday, February 6th, 2008If we go to the numbers, we’ll be here all night, so let’s take a look at states won. Democrats Clinton wins 8 states: Arkansas, Arizona, California, Massachusetts, New Jersey, New York, Oklahoma, Tennessee Obama wins 14 states: Alaska, Alabama, Colorado, Connecticut, Delaware, Democrats Abroad, Georgia, Idaho, Illinois, Kansas, Minnesota, Missouri, North Dakota, Utah, One [...]
Power Rankings: Go!
Wednesday, January 30th, 2008We’ve now pared the fields down enough to put the power rankings into one post. This is good, because I’ve run out of ways to say, “Jebus, but 9iu11ani has no chance.” We’ll start on the left side of the aisle. Democrats 1. Sen. Barack Obama, D-Ill. (Last Rank: 2) Barack Obama really couldn’t have [...]
GOP Power Rankings: Delegates Ain’t Nothin’ but a Number
Saturday, January 19th, 2008Phone the neighbors, wake the kids, it’s time for me to make sense of the completely nonsensical GOP race for the presidency! 1. Former Gov. Mitt Romney, R-Wev (Last Rank: 4) What do you call a guy who’s won half of the primaries, holds a simple majority of delegates, and widened his lead tonight? Well, [...]
Holy Mitt!
Tuesday, January 15th, 2008Somewhere in America, Hugh Hewitt is having an intense, evening-long, self-inflicted orgasm. The numbers: Republicans Multiple Choice Mitt 39% Old Man Surge 30% Radical Cleric Mike Huckabee 16% John Galt 6% Big Sleepy 4% Mayor 9/11 3% Uncommitted 2% The Wallbuilder 0% Democrats Hillary Clinton 55% Uncommitted 40% Dennis Kucinich 4% Chris Dodd 1% Mike [...]
GOP Power Rankings: Someone’s Gotta Win, Right?
Thursday, January 10th, 2008The Democrats have pretty much narrowed it down to Clinton v. Obama. We don’t know who will win, but it will be one of them, and the party will rally ’round the winner just fine. The Republicans, meanwhile…who knows? Things are very weird over there, and they’re only gonna get weirder. 1. Former Gov. Mike [...]
I am Lazarus, come from the dead.
Wednesday, January 9th, 2008So, did anything interesting happen last night? Democrats Hillary Clinton 39% Barack Obama 37% John Edwards 17% Bill Richardson 5% Dennis Kucinich 1% Joe Biden 0% Mike Gravel 0% Chris Dodd 0% Republicans John McCain 37% Mitt Romney 32% Mike Huckabee 11% Rudy Giuliani 9% Ron Paul 8% Fred Thompson 1% Duncan Hunter 0% So…Who’s [...]